You’ve imagined how amazing your life would be with two awesome dogs, envisioned what great pals they’d be, the incredible adventures you will go on. You can picture them now having a nap together in a pool of sunlight on your floor, or romping and frolicking together in the yard. But what if they don’t get along? What if they are so distracted by each other that they don’t listen to you at all? How do you prevent the two dogs from becoming possessive or aggressive with each other?

Here’s how to start off smoothly to set up for success.

Many people assume that to get dogs to become best buddies, all they need to do is to let them figure it out on their own. A great parent wouldn’t just leave their toddler in the playground and let another kid kick or bite them, expecting them to “figure it out”. Instead, we guide, advise and show our kids & dogs how to behave politely so everyone has fun and stays safe.

Begin away from home

On day one, rather than bringing the new dog straight into the house or yard, start off on neutral territory. Introduce the dogs by walking on-leash. Have someone walk one dog, while you walk the other. Begin farther apart at first, then gradually walk closer until you’re walking next to each other with the dogs on the outside. This allows the dogs to get to know each other in a very non-confrontational way without being pressured to interact. Migrating together as a pack helps to build the trust and respect so important to having a well behaved dog. Keep your energy calm, while you take your time and enjoy a nice long walk together.

Welcome home!

Once at home, limit your new dog’s access to your space. Don’t overwhelm them with too much freedom that they haven’t earned yet. Keep the dog leashed (or tethered to you) as you show them around.

If your first dog can already reliably hold a Place command, have them stay on their Place (bed, cot, spot) with a tie-back, while you quietly and calmly show your new dog around. If they can’t reliably stay on Place, you can put your dog in their crate or have the other person take them elsewhere, to avoid interference while you introduce your new dog to their crate, water bowl, Place, and the other rooms they are allowed to enter.

You may choose to “crate and rotate” the dogs for the first few days (by putting one dog in their crate while the other is out). Use your best judgement here. If your original dog has fantastic obedience and a calm mindset, then you can trust them to stay calmly on their Place cot while the new dog is being trained, patted, brushed, etc. If not, put them in their crate. Then crate the new dog while you work with and give attention to your original dog. This way they get to know each other calmly without competition. It allows the dogs to build trust by letting them get to know each other from a safe distance, and builds trust in you as their wise protector and guardian.

Healthy Socialization

When people begin socializing their dog with other dogs, the first thing that usually happens is an on-leash, face-to-face meeting, or an off-leash free-for-all. When dogs are forced to meet on leash they are restrained and feeling trapped can lead to lunging, whining, barking (defence tactics) to scare the other dog away. When let loose in a yard or field to figure it out on their own, one dog may be completely overwhelmed and without reliable recall, you’d have no way to intervene. Neither of these options is ideal if you want a well-socialized dog. In fact, these scenarios can cause both dogs to lose confidence in you as their guardian and protector and leave them without any guidance as to how to behave politely or learn to socialize appropriately.

Polite, trusting calmness is the best way to begin.
The safest and best way to teach dogs to behave well together and to build and maintain trust in you and in other dogs, is to teach them how to calmly co-exist near each other, without staring, touching or playing using the Place command. It’s the ‘off switch’ dogs need to prevent needless stressing. This is teaching them to have good manners and to learn that their best polite behaviour is rewarded by you. They learn to have a calm mindset in the presence of other dogs, while continuing to follow your leadership and commands. This is State of Mind training. This is Calm on Command. This is doggy meditation. Calm co-existence is the most important form of socializing that you can teach your dogs.

We don’t want to teach dogs to get insanely over-excited to meet every dog they see. Imagine if we were like that. “OMG there’s another human!”… then we race over to grab them and jump all over them. That’s crazy for us and it’s equally crazy for dogs. Instead we want to teach our dogs to hang out like relaxed people at a cafe. Calm, cool and easy in each other’s company, without needing to arm-wrestle over anything or prove anything to one another. All we want for now is for the dogs to mind their own business and behave themselves. Over time, they will likely become best friends, but to try to FORCE them to become besties is not the way to get there.

Advocate for both dogs

Once you decide to let the dogs interact, be sure to insist on polite socialization. Don’t let one dog pester, bully or push the other dog around. It’s your job to set firm boundaries about what kind of interaction is allowed. This builds your dog’s trust in you and doesn’t force them to get nasty with each other to stop inappropriate behaviour. The more the dogs see you keeping an eye out for them, the more sensible they will be. You will notice them looking to you for direction and guidance.

Possessiveness

It’s best to set up for success by eliminating things to get possessive over right from the start. What your dogs feel possessive about may surprise you. When we brought home a rescue cat, our dog decided that he would drink ALL of his water to prevent the cat from getting any! Pay special attention to your dogs behaviour around toys, bones, beds, food, water, and access to your personal space. Feeding each dog in their own crate is the safest method. It also prevents one dog from getting fat while the other one goes hungry! Thoroughly teaching each dog (in one-on-one sessions) to DROP IT, LEAVE IT, or the OUT command (whichever you choose) is extremely helpful in keeping them safe around items they may become possessive about. On your word, each dog must relinquish the item to you, rather than fight over it themselves. This can be taught as a fun game, but the intent is serious to keep everyone safe.

Don’t allow one dog to crowd into your space and push or herd the other dog away. Remember that you must set the rules about your space and you decide when and how you interact with each dog. Being firm and clear about this prevents your dogs from becoming possessive over you. You are their teacher, leader, guardian – NOT their possession to fight over. Make the roles clear here to prevent any confusion for your dogs.

Treat your original dog as you normally would. Don’t overwhelm the new dog with too much talking, touching, or treats. Keep things calm to help both dogs adapt.

Take it slowly

Keep the first week or so as a calm, quiet time for your new dog to adjust to their new daily routine. Avoid overwhelming your dog with too many introductions to new people or places right away.

Many people mistakenly give new dogs too much freedom too soon and leave them unattended. You’ll be living with this dog for the rest of their life, so what’s the hurry? Take it slow and only increase your dog’s freedom incrementally when they have completely earned your trust after you have thoroughly taught him/her how to behave in your home and with your other dog. It’s not fair to correct a dog for making a mistake until you are sure they know what to do and what not to do.

Keep leashes on both dogs while supervising indoors so you have the ability to guide them when needed. Do this as long as you feel necessary. This is a super simple step that can make life a lot easier while showing your dogs how to live well together.

No Free Roaming

Help your dogs succeed by giving them a structured home life with clear rules to follow. If your new dog is either safely in their crate, on their Place cot while back tied, or leashed/tethered to your belt for the first 90 days, this gives the dog ample time to learn what behaviour is allowed so they don’t develop and practice bad habits that need to be corrected later on. It’s much easier to show your new dog repeatedly what they ARE allowed to do, and to catch their intention to do the wrong thing and guide them immediately to stop, than to correct unwanted behaviours that have become ingrained habits later on. By following this advice your dog will never have the ability to disappear behind your sofa to “have an accident”, will never develop the habit of chasing your cat, or eating your stuff, or stealing from your counter, etc.

Quality Time

Successful dog training is all about being a great observer of behaviour and teacher. That requires that you spend lots of time together. Whenever you don’t have that time, put your dogs in their crates to prevent them from practicing things that dogs will naturally do (barking, chewing, peeing, pooping). As the saying goes, “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure”. You got a dog to spend quality time together and the time you spend now will pay off in having a great dog who makes great choices!

If you’re deciding how to best socialize your dog, here are some important factors to consider. What kind of socializing is healthy? What environment will help your dog to gain better behaviours rather than develop bad habits? If you’re hiring a dog walker, what skills and experience do they have? How much do they know about dog behaviour? Will your dog be bullied and traumatized by other dogs (or become a bully, overly defensive or reactive), or will they be taught, guided and advocated for?

Are Dog Parks a Healthy place for Dog Socialization?

The short answer is NO – not usually. In theory, dog parks are a wonderful invention, but the majority of dog park interactions can be very bad for your dog. Here is our experience. When we started offering dog walking, we mainly took dogs to off-leash dog parks – like basically every dog walker out there. Over time, we saw that most dog parks are filled with out-of-control dogs that their owners simply cannot walk on-leash because their dogs are not trained. Those dogs were dangerous to the dogs in our care because they were wildly over-excited and wouldn’t return to their owners/handlers when called – especially when they were behaving badly. Usually the owners didn’t even try to control their dogs, or realize when their behaviour was anti-social or showing signs of becoming dangerous. Many owners sit down at the dog park and ignore their dog completely! People forget that dogs are predators and in order to keep them safe, we need to provide structure and guidance. If your dog is attacked or bullied, they can lose trust in you as their advocate which can create reactivity or aggression to defend themselves against perceived threats that they feel they need to handle on their own.

Structured group dog walking is so much better for dogs!

Here’s why:

• dogs build positive socialization & bond in a calm, healthy way
• migrating together is instinctually satisfying
• structured dog walking maintains the hard work you invested in training your dog
• mentally engaging (to match pace, maintain position & ignore squirrels, other dogs & people, skateboards, etc.)
• reinforces good behaviour & calmness
• physical fitness promotes long-term health
• structured dog walking is much safer for your dog
• Fun! with increased ability to visit new & interesting locations

More UNhealthy Dog Socialization is not better

Too many dog owners out there assume that ‘more is better’, without considering what KIND of socialization their dog is experiencing. Carefully choose quality socialization over quantity. For example: You wouldn’t plonk your toddler in the sand box at a playground and expect them to “figure it out” when bullies throw sand in their eyes. You’d mentor, protect and guide them, showing kids what kind of behaviour is allowed and expected. Yet many dog owners – even ones who think of their dogs as “fur babies” – allow their dogs to build very bad social habits and develop serious phobias due to the lack of guidance and rules while in dog parks. It’s better to have no socialization than bad socialization.

Structured Dog Walks are the Best way to Bond

On-leash structured group dog walking is by far the best way for dogs to socialize and bond while working together as a team, rather than competing. Off-leash romping at the dog park can be fun, but only IF the dogs are behaving well. However, most dogs have not been taught how to socialize politely. Poorly socialized dogs challenge each other with stiff body postures, high tails, snarling, teeing up (putting their chin on the other dog’s shoulders), or attempting to hump, chase, gang up, bully, or bite each other.

Dogs that are well socialized can enjoy hanging out calmly with one another. Put into human terms, a poorly socialized dog is like an insecure person constantly challenging everyone they meet to arm wrestle, compared to confident adults talking and walking together in a peaceful, cooperative way.

But will my dog get enough exercise to be calm?

Structured on-leash dog walking tires dogs out just as much, if not more than off-leash play. Why? Because your dog is using their mind, their body, and their self-control. Maintaining a fantastic heel position is hard work – which is great in many ways. Dogs are fulfilled by having a purpose. Dogs LOVE having a job to do! They demonstrate their best behaviour when there are clear rules to follow. This makes them feel safe and happy in a relaxed way.

Off-leash dog park play generally amps dogs up – getting them into a frenzy of excitement. Many owners believe that their dog needs hours and hours of flat-out running in order to behave at home. The truth is that most dogs only need a couple of structured walks per day (between half an hour to an hour each), plus some outdoor play with you (e.g. training games are great, such as fetch, tug, disc, hide & seek for items). The goal for the average family is not to create a dog who is a marathon athlete who then needs hours of running beside your bicycle in order to behave well.

The best behaved dogs are those whose owners make being calm a way of life for their dogs. This good habit extends to every aspect of their lives. Relaxed dogs don’t do stupid stuff. For dogs, over-excitement is like getting drunk. Think of all of the stupid stuff people do when drunk that they’d normally never do – like get in fights, break stuff, or hurt themselves. Over-excited dogs are FAR more likely to feel stressed/anxious, jump on people, bite, run away, fight, over-react to bikes, skateboards, cars, cats, squirrels, other dogs, etc. Building a calm state of mind is key to developing a well-behaved dog.

Advocating for dogs is key in building trust

The dogs in our care trust us to protect them so they remain calm and well-behaved. They know that we never allow strange dogs to greet them while walking on the leash or allow strangers to grope them. We also avoid strangers who talk to dogs in a high-pitched, questioning, or over-excited way. The dogs trust us to remain calm and patient and keep them safe, rather than expecting them to protect us. This trust allows dogs to relax and follow our lead.

Why shouldn’t you let your dog greet unknown dogs while leashed? Because dogs are MUCH more likely to react badly while meeting on leash. They are usually overexcited, which often leads to poor decisions. They’re constrained and can’t move away freely if they feel they need space. Owners often allow leashes to remain tense, adding to any nervous tension. Meeting nose to nose is bad doggy etiquette. Plus, if things go wrong quickly, how many owners know what to do, or are willing to do it? Prevent your dog from getting overexcited while expecting to meet everyone they pass. Prevent your dog from building negative associations with strange dogs – not to mention vet bills and the real possibility of death. On-leash attacks happen all of the time. This traumatizes dogs and can lead to a long, difficult recovery process. Allowing dogs to meet on leash is so not worth it. Set your dog up for success by walking calmly WITH other well-behaved dogs that they know well, rather than rolling the dice with strange dogs while hoping for the best with face-to-face on-leash meetings.

Communication: Each Tool is a like new Language

We use dog training tools to communicate in ways that dogs understand and actually care about so they make better choices. You see dog owners allowing their dogs to yank them all over. This is dangerous for everyone. People and dogs get seriously injured – broken bones, being dragged into traffic, dogs running away & getting lost, attacking other dogs or people, etc. Every day these behaviours get dogs turned into shelters &/or killed. Some dogs are such a struggle or embarrassment to walk that they only get walked in the middle of the night, or are forever confined to their own backyards.

Prong collars are widely misunderstood tools. They look barbaric but are actually a much safer and gentler way to guide dogs. No doubt you’ve seen plenty of dogs literally choking themselves and hacking while pulling fiercely on regular flat buckle collars. Trachea damage is serious and not at all uncommon. Dogs wearing harnesses tend to pull like sled-dogs (which is what harnesses are designed for!) with zero regard for the human on the other end of the leash. The goal is teamwork between human and dog – not a tug of war with humans getting yanked around. Prong collars provide the ability to guide dogs gently and allow for much improved communication and control. The pressure is evenly distributed around the dog’s neck without causing any harm. As with any collar, pressure should never be maintained for more than a split second. Letting tension remain along the leash is one of the main reasons why people struggle while walking their dogs.

Ecollars are similarly misunderstood by most dog owners. Ecollars are absolutely fantastic! First, dogs should be gently, fairly and thoroughly trained to understand this new language of low-level stimulation. We teach dogs about ecollars as we teach a dog to respond to leash guidance – with gentle pressure, then the sensation is immediately removed as soon as the dog responds. We begin with leash guidance, to show the dog what we’re asking them to do when they feel that new sensation/tingle. Dogs respond exceptionally well – with unparalleled reliability – when there is clear communication and accountability. Keep in mind that no tool trains a dog by itself! Calm, patient training is required. Any tool can be used improperly and cause harm if the person is uneducated or intends to harm. Quality Ecollars are perfectly safe, wonderful tools. Dogs who have been well-trained with ecollars can safely enjoy a much more inclusive life with their families and have earned the freedom that comes with trusting that your dog will respond to commands, no matter what is going on around you. When you know that you can confidently call your dog and s/he will return to you immediately, in ANY situation, everyone stays safe and enjoys more fun and freedom. 🙂

We were among those who were previously misinformed about both of these amazing tools! So if this is new to you, please keep an open mind while you take the time to learn the truth.

Set up Play Dates in yards or Empty Dog Parks

If you want your dog to socialize off-leash with other dogs, setting up a play date with another calm, balanced dog in a back yard or empty dog park is a much better option than taking your chances at a dog park filled with strangers. We searched all over to find one park that is usually empty during the work-week, where we can closely supervise and guide the dogs while they fetch, romp, roll in the grass, sniff the scents of the great outdoors and socialize politely. If an overly excited or anxious-looking dog approaches the park, we simply leave and take to the trails instead. An even better solution is to ensure your dog’s heel is fantastic and teach your dog to have completely reliable recall so you can enjoy the great outdoors with total confidence that your dog will come when called, and not be restricted to using the dog parks at all. Then the world is your oyster- beaches, trails, camping – you name it!